Maldives - Lagoon Snorkeling

Facing the Fear
On the morning of our second day with the low tide in my face, I couldn't hide any longer. I had to prove to myself that I wasn't a chump. Ok, the truth - I had to prove it to Dodo. Had she not been there, I could have comfortably chumped out - it's worked fine so far in my 44 years. I put on the flippers, spit into the mask, wiped it down (I remember that trick from Wild Kingdom), squeezed it over my head and bit down hard on the breathing tube. I waddled over to the ladder. Dodo gave me the thumbs up sign. If she only knew - I could barely breathe already. Once in, the water only came up to my navel. Still, these old fears are not rational. I bent over and put my face in the water. My pulse shot up. I was talking to myself. "Calm down, calm down. Breathe." Then, I did it - I pushed off and floated face first. The water closed over my ears and POW, I shot back up, standing straight, creating a huge splash.
Back down again into the water a second time. I saw the bottom of the lagoon, the sand. I felt the water close over my ears but I stayed down. I was floating well - the flippers and the mask made me buoyant at both ends. I concentrated on my breathing - I couldn't get it under control - fine on the intake, but short, shallow bursts out. I paddled a bit, feeling more confident. I kept talking to myself "Relax. Breathe. Soft breaths in and out." Then, just like that, it was over - the panic was gone. I felt ok, then surprised, then happy. I was comfortable enough to make my way over to the small coral and watch some fish. I was floating in the lagoon and enjoying myself! When I finally looked up, Dodo was sitting on the deck right next to the ladder, eyeing me, looking a bit anxious. She didn't take any photos, so I have no evidence. You'll just have to take my word.